Loading...

Sunday, November 22, 2009

Welcome to Heartbreak Hotel...

November 21, 2009

The weirdest thing happened today. I think I got DUMPED on our 4 yrs and 7th month anniversary. My bf and I are supposed to watch the movie 2012 in The Americana in Glendale, CA. We got the tickets for 8:15pm but we got there late and the theater was packed so we had to exchange them for the 10:25pm schedule. To pass time, we walked around, visited clothing stores, and had dinner. While waiting for our order, I checked my facebook account on his iPhone and showed him a photo of what I wore the night I went clubbing with my girlfriends...  It's that Gloria-V bodysuit from American Apparel that Megan Fox wore in Rolling Stones mag. You might have seen xppinx sporting the same outfit in her blog. Also the same outfit that I got a dispute with AA if you have read my previous blog entries. So the boyfriend got mad. He obviously didn't want me wearing revealing clothes and I did anyway. He said I never listen to him that I do whatever I please as if I'm single. In my mind I asked..What am I supposed to wear to a club? A turtleneck? After that, he refused to talk to me the whole time. I kept asking him and tried to explain but he wouldn't look me in the eyes as if I'm talking to a wall. After eating, we walked back to the theater, actually he walked way ahead of me. I was following him. He was so far ahead that I couldn't even catch up. I was deeply hurt coz It's the first time a guy did this to me. I am thinking of leaving maybe take a cab home or something but I still have the movie tickets with me so I just kept on following him. I saw him entered the theater and then I lost him again. So I went to the ladies room. I wanted to cry so bad I don't want people to see me and feel sorry for me, plus I don't wanna ruin my makeup. I know right? so vain even in a time like this. Then I went out saw him smoking a cig outside the theater. I gave him his ticket without saying a word then I walked back in. He wasn't coming in. I just sat there in the bench and waited. Still got 45 minutes before the movie starts. I was thinking of maybe calling my brother to pick me up if ever the bF leaves me there. I was deeply hurt because NEVER in my life did a guy treated me this way. Then I saw couples that are super sweet and thought to myself how lucky they are. I decided to wait more. Then the bf came inside 20 minutes before the movie starts. After maybe 10 minutes of not talking, he said he's sleepy and wanted to go home instead. So I gave him my ticket and he got it refunded. He walked out of the theater and there I was following him again. He walked way ahead of me. I saw him lighting another cig while walking towards the parking lot. I finally got in his car and waited till he finished smoking. Then I offered him the scented hand sanitizer (like I always do after he smokes) but he said he doesnt want it. Then he started the car and we were quiet the whole time driving on the way home. I leaned on his shoulder and tried to hold his hand but he said 'I'm driving!' I tried holding back my tears. He just wanted to drop me off the curb but I insisted he park his car and we should talk first. He refused and said he's sleepy and he'll just call me. What an excuse right? It's only like 10:30pm and he's sleepy! At this point I felt that it was over between us. But I don't want to leave his car. I wanted to hear it person. I wanted to hear and see him say that it's over! But he refused. I can see that he is really annoyed by me now at this time. So I decided to give up. I just said thanks for the dinner and happy anniversary and he just said okay. I thought to myself that this maybe the last time I'm gonna see him so I hugged him tightly and I whispered to his ear 'thank you.' I left and walked to my house. I started crying coz I couldn't hold the tears back anymore. I'm pretty sure he saw me. He stayed there until I got inside my house. I walked straight to my room and cried more. I waited for him to call but he never did. I sent him a text message after almost 2 hours..."You promised you'd call when you get home" but no reply. I'm still in shock and still trying to process what just happened. He can't just leave me because of wearing that damn outfit. Maybe there's more to it. I'm clueless to what he was thinking. I refuse to think negatively. I have no idea what to do. I have not seen this side of him until now. It's surprising after so many years of being with him. I never thought he would abandon me like that. So I guess that's it. I think just got dumped over stupid stuff. I searched for some fitting breakup songs online, found this and then cried myself to sleep... Pause @ 0:22 "Love is putting up with someone's bad qualities...because they somehow complete you" ***

32 comments:

resham said...

well, i am some random person to comment...but i think outfit was just a trigger..There must be things bothering him...they were piling on...
just wait...talk to him and then decide whatevr u wana do...
but his behaviour over dressing was...weired..
M sorry...

PiinkCupcakez said...

whatttt.. after almost 5 yrs hes gonna act like that over nothing?
guys are such idiots!
i hope things get better.. keep us posted

nihrida said...

I'm sorry to hear that. I broke up with someone after 5 years together because of a stupid fight. It was all over in a matter of seconds...
You can't really know a person...ever. Hope that thing will work out. ((hugs))

Linho said...

oh girl! maybe he just needs time to figure out his feelings.. indeed its a stupid thing to fight/break up but hopefully he'll call in the next few days.

jooLee said...

girl i feel you, my bf got mad at me for what i wore to the club, saying i should have worn shorts or tights with my dress. in the end, he has to realize he needs to trust you, if he still can't trust you after all this time, then the relationship can't grow

Carine said...

The worse is that he chose to ignore you instead of sorting things out (childish side of men, i guess). I think that the outfit is probably not the thing that made him so mad, there's probably something more. The sentence finishing by "as if you were single" is very revealing. Personnaly, I think that being independent is a really good thing but for him, it seems to be a problem. If i was to give you an advice, i would say "go to his home when you know he's there and force him to talk about all that". That's your choice though, it's just a suggestion ^^ Anyway, I hope you're allright <3

Elisa said...

I agree with the first comment. There must be more to it than just what happened. You guys HAVE to talk. It's wrong to just drop it and walk away. You won't get any closure that way and it'll make it harder.

Jane said...

the whole situation sounds like a middle school couple arguing.. like he's really gonna get that mad over something so small!? there has to be something else to it &what i thought was stupid was he was avoiding discussing it w/ you.

i hope you're doing okay.. &i'm sure you'll both figure things out evenually give it a couple of days. (:

charlene-ann said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Tamara said...

OMG! That is terrible...

But honestly, that outfit probably wasn't the thing that made him go crazy. Probably there was stuff that were wrong before? Stuff that he didn't tell you about?
I don't know.. if that outfit was the only reason, I think it's about time you discovered 'his little secret'...
his dark side :/

Still, it must really hurt.. because after 5 years you don't know his dark side.. :( it's sad...

I hope you'll get well soon... You could think this way...
" I don't need a boyfriend to be happy, because I am self sufficient"

bunee said...

you look SMOKING !!!

i agree with everyone . if he actually got THAT mad, its not about the outfit and you guys need to talk it out . but if it was, youre the one who needs to dump him, not the other way around .

seriously ? he needs to realize that how you dress is not about him or anyone else ! as a girl, one of many ways of making ourselves happy is by feeling pretty . well, at least i know i do . vain, but thats just how girls are . im not dressing for anyone else but me . it makes me feel pretty and sexy . by getting mad at how you dress, is like getting mad at you for making yourself happy . just because he doesnt feel comfortable with it doesnt mean you should give up that happy, proud feeling of being sexy . thats controlling ! you should NOT be controlled or even feel controlled in any way in a relationship ! you should NOT limit yourself for the sake of the bf ! if anything, he should be proud of you for being so sexy and confident and want to show you off to everyone .

you guys should talk things out . if he doesnt, its not your fault, you didnt do anything wrong . DONT bow down to his unreasonable needs .

sorry im just rambling . ive been through an abusive relationship and it hurts me so much when i see girls being mistreated in a relationship . youre hot . you seem like a smart, sweet girl . just remember that ;)

Becky (everyday makeup) said...

Hello ate! Im got really sad reading this post. You look really sexy in the outfit and if i was dressed like that, my bf would kill me. Im not saying you shouldnt wear anything you please but that top is really revealing, esp that you wore it na hindi sya kasama. Like what you said in the post he doesnt like it when you wear revealing clothes. I know a sexy top might seems like a small thing but for the guys its such a big deal. Hes probably imagining all the guys who looked at you that night. But you know your bf well so i dunno...

On the other hand, it doesnt give him the right to treat you that way. If he was mad and annoyed, he would have just told you if he can take you home and continue your date some other night instead of making you feel like crap the whole time.

I know its not over between you guys. He will come around. Just give him time. Both of you need to talk and be humble.

I hope i didnt offend you with my comment.

Edna said...

OMG I'm so sorry! I hope he will come to his senses to realize what a HOT GF he has! Its not like you went out to the club with your girlfriends to get HIT ON by other guys! *hugs*

Jasmin said...

Awww.. Sucks it happened, esp. on your Anni.. Loved the oufit though.. There has to be more to it, and maybe he doesn't feel like talking at the moment.. We say and do things are don't mean when we're angry, so you never know. Keep your head up!

charlene-ann said...

hey mama, so i think i just accidentally deleted my old post =/ but anyways hun as everyone has been saying just keep your head up...you'll get through this...& honestly if you need to cry it out..then go for it...sometimes it really does help...try to talk things out but if he still refuses then give him time, i'm sure he'll come around...he probably just needs space right now...you seem like a strong woman so i don't have a doubt in my mind that you will get through this =) *hugs

pangie said...

you know, my man has the same issue with me when i go out with the girls to the club but you know what? it's their insecurities that gets them in trouble. your man needs to trust you and be able to understand you as well. but like the first comment, he probably had other things that was building up but really... what a stupid reason to get overly upset with you over, esp on your anniversary. with a man like that who's so insecured about you... maybe he's not worth your tears you know. but hang in there and stay strong. we're all here to listen to you vent. *hugs*

LePooke said...

Aww babe, Im so sorry! I hope things work out. I hope you can at least talk things through...

1xellus1 said...

hope you feel better. guys get really possessive about cleavage & stuff like that. they don't want others to see what they've got. it's typical girl. i hope things work out for you.

MaryBelle said...

WOW!!Honey first you should kn you didnt do anything wrong and second dont lower yourself.Give him sometime if he is mature enough he should get back to you and talk about what is bothering him. Be strong and if not than move on. Its too bad for him if he cant trust his girlfriend.xxxx

Becky (everyday makeup) said...

you know, i remember you saying that your bf doesnt compliment you anymore from an old post. You must really, really love him to put up with all this stuff. Maybe the girls are right, maybe there is something else. Hmmm...you know him well. Try not to be blinded with love. You deserve to be treated like a queen. Like what youve said, youve been a great girlfriend and If he wants to end it then he should just tell you instead of making you miserable.

Just cry it all out!! So you can get it out of your system.

*aly said...

I'm no expert in this but if he's mad about the outfit, it means he cares? I think time will heal things but if you still love him maybe he just needs some time to figure himself out. Wish you all the best and don't worry, there's always something good in everything. =)

Beauty Bitch said...

Firstly, my personal reaction: you look HAWT in the picture and your boyf should be delighted that your his girlfriend.

That aside, I can see why a guy might have a problem with his girlfriend wearing revealing clothing BUT there's a way to approach it. If I was in his situation I would have said clearly and calmly that I was upset, explained the reasons it bothered me and then ask that you reconsier or take his feelings into consideration when dressing for a night out without him. Then you could decide how to respond.

Good luck with it all.

xphoebelinax said...

oh honey@ im so sorry to hear what you're going through but maybe he's just mad? guys do so much stupid shit when they're angry, like my bf also... they don't see like us that, oh it's an anniversary, i'm just going to ignore all the annoying stuff you do because it's a day of celebration, they just go with their emotions... have you spoken to him since? you really should try to talk to him, and if he still doesn't want to, then SCREW HIM! you can do better, being a relationship means being open to communication and he's obviously not doing so!

i hope you are feeling better and everything is sorted out doll. take care of yourself.xo

JJ said...

Hey, girl... it seems to me that he thinks of you more than a girlfriend... more as a wife and future mother of his children. I'm sure he was upset because he expects you to dress or act a certain way to uphold his vision of what a wife and mother should be. You should try to take his feelings into account, at least that's what I would do. It's really up to you, and what your relationship means to you. 5 years is a long time, longer than most marriages these days. I support you, darling, please know this, but don't throw a meaningful relationship away by having too much pride... I say, show up at his work with roses and a teddy bear and just talk things through. Hope for the best!

<3 JJ

12ayOFsunSHYNE said...

OH MY GOSH! I'm so sorry that happened to you. You didn't deserve that or the way it ended. Try to hang in there. The best thing to do right now is keep yourself busy or hang out with people that love you. Hope that you feel better soon. *hugs*

annieo said...

awwww hun i hope things work out for you, he didn't do the right thing by ignoring the situation and giving you the cold shoulder, especially on your anniversary :( he's just mad because his insecure and if he took a second to think things through he'd realize you guys have been together for so long, he shouldn't have any more insecurities and should trust you no matter what you wear!

sending you my love xxx

Kalmo said...

I'm so sorry you had to experience such a terrible night. It's terrible that someone who is supposed to care about you treated you so horribly. I don't know the whole story or anything but you deserve to be treated well and with love. I hope you feel better soon.

Becky (everyday makeup) said...

Ate thanks for trusting me with your problem. I can listen anytime. I can only go from what youre telling me. Just weigh things. Make a list of the good and bad things about him or the relationship and be honest to yourself. Then you can go from there to see if you want to make it work or not. But from what you told me he sounds like a butthole. I agree that its a trust issue, but its been 4 or 5 years and he needs to make up his mind if he trust you or not.

I have a good man by my side pero hindi madali yung 7 years relationship namin together. Its too personal to mention over the internet baka marami makabasa hehe pero dumating kami sa point na masama na yung relationship. We both had to change completely, as in! Loka loka din kc ako and were both opposite but now we finally learned how to make it work. We still have problems pero petty na lang.

lastly, were not getting any younger and you have to ask yourself if you see your future with a guy like him?? Is it worth it?

I'm always here for you...

Jules said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Jules said...

Hey Angel. Sorry to hear about this, but I think there is something you should know about why your bf acted the way he did. This year I'm taking Psych II and I'm seriously learning a lot of things about relationships and people's actions. First of all, your bf walking ahead of you is an indication that he is the controlling one and wants to be the leader in the relationship...and that sadly means that the respect for each other is unequal otherwise you would walk side by side, holding hands <--(not always). I think that for a relationship to work dapat hindi submissive yung isa tapos possessive yung isa kasi di ka naman object para maging possession. When my prof. explained this to me in class...I realized that breaking up with my bf of 4 years was the right thing to do because I know I don't want to be in a type of relationship where I will feel like I'm always chasing after someone and where I have to make excuses, sacrificing what I want just so the other person can be happy. Don't ever forget that your first priority is yourself and making yourself HAPPY at all times. This is your life and the worse thing that can happen is for you to loose yourself. Trust me Angel...if this relationship doesn't work out, you will definitely become a stronger person who will find someone better. Someone who's not insecure and will make you feel bad for wearing something you want to wear. I myself, found that special man and he makes me feel good about myself and accepts me just as I am. We even promised that we won't try to change each other and if we ever do have issues, then we will work through it and talk it out the best way we can. Well, I hope you feel better and if you ever need to talk, I am here for you. Tsaka isipin mo nalang...pag mamahal ba kung pag hihintayin ka nya at di ka nya pupuntahan kagad? Matitiis mo ba talaga ang taong mahal mo? I don't think so. Kung mahal mo, kahit ano pa ang problema ninyo di mo sya pababayaan.

Anonymous said...

I asked my best friend who is a guy and from his point of view- your boyfriend is insecure that you wear revealing clothes. But men should trust their girls of 4 years, sorry that you were treated that way

SwatchCrazee said...

@Anonymous: Your comment is so much appreciated. Thanks for asking ur bestfriend. I really needed a guy's opinion on this.